....

I hate this world for being so unfair!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I dont understand why people are so cruel?????????? it seems to me that they dont have hearts at all...they cant understand me and my feelings......Stupid authority...they think they are the best...and if they have power,they can do whatever they want to............hate Spain Consulate general!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! F...You all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! U just killed me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! All what i was dreaming about gone because of you!!!!!!!!! You are not people!!! U r heartless robots!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HAte you!hate you! hate you!!!!!!
OMG, why life is so difficult???????? the only thing i was asking from God is to help me to visit my man.......I didnt ask for anything else...cuz I dont need other things..I just want to be with a person whom I love....and now all over....Im not going...I have no visa...I need to cancel my flight......and it means that I will spend another year before I see my man.....I dunno what to do.....anger, sadness, love and disappointment mixed together...and i cant express my feelings right now.....Im Speechless.............powerless.................wanna cry......or no...I wanna climb to the highest mountain and jump from the top of it down to the ground..dont wanna live...
O, God....why this is happening with me??????? I was a good girl..I was trying to live a normal life....I am not killing people..Im not stealing anything..Im just stydying and working in order to make my mom's and my life easier.....Im only ambitious..dat's true.....but this is natural...everybody wants to have a prospective future.....they set their goals..and ty to achieve them....
therefore it is so hard to me to understand why this is happening to me.....why dont YOU want me to visit him....He is the one that I was dreaming about...and now we are so far apart...we live in different cuntries...and dont even have an opportunity to see each other.....it is unfair........................................................................................................................This is not what i deserve.........dont wanna live like that........

Thinking about You...

I was on my way to bed and wanted to write you a little note. Thank you so much for having so much faith in me and in us as a couple. Thank you for making me a better person, and for giving your heart to me and opening up so much.Over the last 11 months, it's been wonderful; I never expected to feel this way nor actually be with you in this way, experiencing life with you. You are wonderful ... to me, to my friends, to my family. You make me really happy and even though we are apart so much of the time, I believe it will made up the time when I see you again.

I was thinking so much about that earlier tonight, when I am going to meet you at the airport. I am getting butterflies in my stomach just at the thought of seeing you again. You make everything complete and I can't imagine spending time with someone else and having these feelings for anyone else. I'm anxious to see you again honey. Time is ticking, and it's going by really slow....

It takes a strong man to accomplish everything that you have in your life, I am proud of you that you stick to your goals, you have improved your life so much from what it was before and I am so happy that you respect my beliefs as I respect yours. You say that you are going to make me a happy woman ... well, you have already done that, just by being you and showing me love and being so open with your feelings. You are what I dreamed of when I was a little girl, someone with integrity, honesty, love, affection, handsome, and with such a charming personality. I never thought I would find you, but here you are.I love you so much, and can't wait to be with you again. I want to give you my heart and soul. I don't care about anything else in the world because I am in love with you... I love you. Thank you, for you have made all of my dreams come true. I could not ask for more. I am the luckiest girl in the world to be called your girlfriend, I'm truly honored. Thank you.

Library time...

Hey everybody.......right now I am sitting with Stephanie in the library....trying to do our presentation..lol well she is working on it(hopefully) while Im writing this post...:))))) xe xe xe what i wanted to ask you guys.....because it is our last week together...and then some of you will go backhome....and some of you will enter SAIT or different faculties in U of C, I would like you to do me a favour...:))) jejeje dont worry, i just want you to leave me ur contacts..:))) like hi5 profile....myspace...windows live space or ringo...tagged.....wherever u have...:))) cuz i m always in the internet...:) and it would be nice to have ur contacts,so that we can communicate at least once in a while...:)))
also , i would like to say that it was very fun to study with you....:) i learned so many new things from ur cultures....still dont know how to swear in chinese or spanish..yet, i believe that i will..one day....lol
what else.....jejeje.... tomorrow is our pot luck....:) and as I noticed everybody are going to bring junk food!!!!!!!jejeje it means that the only person that can cook is Wendy!!!!!!!!:) she is going to bring potato salad!!!!!!!yummi!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! thanks Wendi! you gonna safe my life from sturvation!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!;))))))))
as for me, i m going to bring a cake....but i m not gonna cook it.. i will just go to Safeway..:) and buy one...:)jejeje sorry ,guys...:) sorry Ssiley....I know that you want me to bring some ABSOLUT..... but I prefer tequilla.....so.... do u know what i mean?jejejeje

About life....

Everytime when I have a difficult period in my life, and Im afraid of taking risks because of my fear......I read the words of Paulo Coelho..... and after reading some of your blogs..I decided to share this useful piece of writing with those who feel scared, and lost...... hope that it will help you not to give up,and encourageyou to take everything from this LIFE!!! ...Tell your heart that the fear of suffering is worse than the suffering itself. And no heart has ever suffered when it goes in search of its dream.' You have to take risks. We will only understand the miracle of life fully when we allow the unexpected to happen. Every day, God gives us the sun - and also one moment in which we have the ability to change everything that makes us unhappy. Every day, we try to pretend that we haven't perceived that moment, that it doesn't exist, that today is the same as yesterday and will be the same as tomorrow. Pitiful is the person who is afraid of taking risks. Perhaps this person will never be disappointed or disillusioned; perhaps she won't suffer the way people do when they have a dream to follow. But when the person looks back, she will hear her heart saying, 'What have you done with the miracles that God planted in your days? What have you done with the talents God bestowed on you? You buried yourself in a cave because you were fearful of losing those talents. So this is your heritage: the certainty that you have wasted your life... - Paulo Coelho -

one of those days.....

Today was a crazy day for me........My friend called me at 5 am in the morning , and told me smth very unpleasant...:((( It almost killed me because I didnt expect to hear such a bad news....:(( then, when i was going to drop my lil bro to his nanny...one stupid bee attacked us.....I didnt know what to do, I was so scared because I have already lost a war to moskitos one week ago...and didnt want to get one extra bite....hovewer, my lilttle brother was so scared ,so he started screamng and running ;)) poor guy...the bee caught him, and he got a bite right into his ear....:(((( OMG, you should've seen his face...he was crying a lot, and all our neighbors heard him.....Thanks God I had my "Anty Bite"cream with me,so i was able to help him..but still it was a second time duing these three days when we were attacked by bees!!!!!!! I dont understand them!!! Why are they so angry here??We did nothing to them,we didnt even tried to bother them....;((( Strange country....with strange moskitos and bees.... guys be carefull, and make sure that u have a special cream with you just in case if you meet this little angry devils!!!!!! yet, it is not the end of a story.....by laws of irony, on my way back I lost 60$!!!!!! ;(( the most horrible thing was that I needed to give this money to our nanny....so basicly instead of paying 60$ , I paid double.....:( dat's awefull....:( I am so pissed offf ffffff..................... and all in all, It is 9;20 pm right now,and I didnt even started writing my essay...............................................aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa..................................wish me some luck,plz!!!!!! I am so miserable..............

Just thoughts....

Today is just a regular day....it is sunday....my day off..usually I spend this day with my family somewhere in a park, but today thy went to a irthday party, and Im staing at home....why?cuz I have to write my bibliography and attending lectures project...;( most of you have already finished it....as for me...I haven't even started doing them...:) as usual..this is my nature..jejeje
I dunno why,but i wil never start writing my assignments a week earlier..even if I try hard, it woon't work!!!! For me it is easier to do something under time pessure..isn't it weird???? i mean, the only person that is doing the same is Sisley..:) as or the rest of the class...I can see them workingon their drafts 3-4 days before the dus day...dat' amazing! I wish i can be like that... i mean be so organized....but i dont think that i m gonna learn how to do it..:) dat' my nature..I dont like planing things..cuz everytime when i plan smth, evrything goes in a wrong way!! I hate it!!!!! I dont understand why it is happening with me...:( yet, when i make something spontaneous, i usually have a great success...:) dat' ridiculous...

LAtin festivals

Hey Everybody!!!!! How r u doing???hope dat' everything is going right because today is a such a wonderful day!!!!!! Sun is shining, Birds are singing.....people are smiling...I love it!!!! Saturday is a perfect day for going out of the city...somewhere to the park...have a picknic with someone whom u love(family, friends, BF or GF) and just forget about problems at school, work or somewhere else...If you are not able to do it,you can just go to Olimpic plaza, there going to be a salsa festival today!! lot's of fun for those who admire latin culture!!!:))) by the way, tomorrow is another salsa festival,but on kensington/10 str. from 11 to 5 pm!!!! there going to be a lot of people tomorrow so it is a good chance to meet new people!!!!also u can listen to latin music...such as SALSA( inspiration of the body) ;)))))) if you know how to take steps,you will have a chance to rock everybody and show your dancing skills!!!:))))) and after festival u can go for a dinner, and for awalk ,and then join latin people at SOHO night club which is situated at 6 str/ 9 ave SW downtown....they will have a special guest tomorrow...;) just because of festivals!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So i f you want to have a lot of fun, and become acquanted with latin culture this weekend is a perfect time to do it!!!! have fun guys!!:)))

What is love? One must understand whether "what is love" can be a question which can be answered? Love cannot be a question. For, if it is a question then an answer should be there. If the answer is there, where is it? This question is ancient and an answer should have been found by now! If the answer has been found, the question would have disappeared. But the question still remains, meaning the answer has not been found. If it has not been found as yet, then what is the certainty that it will be found? Maybe the mind can never find the answer! A single answer, which will please all minds, is not possible for each mind has its own ideas of love. Hence a universal answer is an illusion. Individual answers are there for love and for this very reason there are arguments about love for each mind will contradict the answer of another mind. This contradiction is normal for each mind lives in a different point in time. Hence "what is love" is an illusionary question, which has no answer............

How do you define love?
Some say it's mysterious, magical, complex, difficult, imaginary, thought-provoking, inspirational, intuitional, joyous, immeasurable, ecstasy, and undefinable. Perhaps.
In one of Dr. John Gray's audio cassettes he defines love as follows: "Love is a feeling directed at someone which acknowledges their goodness."

HOwever, My favorite is by Paramahansa Yogananda: "To describe love is very difficult, for the same reason that words cannot fully describe the flavor of an orange. You have to taste the fruit to know its flavor. So with love."

The MAgic Of Friendship

If somebody asks u, WHAT IS FRIENDSHIP? what will be ur answer????? I guess there are millions of defiitions for this word because each person has its own pint of view...well... if you check it in dictionary, u will find something like that: Friend (frend) noun. 1. A person whom one knows, likes and trusts. 2. A person with whom one is allied in a struggle or cause; comrade. 3. One who supports, sympathizes with, or patronizes a group. 4. An acquaintance. However, the dictionary makes one small omission.....It doesn't speak of the years that a friendship endures.........the laughter that fills the air when friends are together...............the support, understanding and comfort a friend can offer ...............or the anguish you cannot escape from when a friend is dying............;( The dictionary, I'm afraid, cannot begin to define the word: FRIEND!!!! So then what is this magic called Friendship? Is there a magic wand that silently transforms you and those special people on a jouney into,what sometimes can be a lifelong relationship? Is it mutual admiration, common interests, the need to be a friend? Or is it just an enduring tie that bonds you together,allows you to almost think as one and gives you one of lifes greatest joys. Friendships are precious jewels. Treat them as such.Enjoy them! Celebrate them! And never take them for granted.

Friends.....

Have you ever wished upon a star? And nothing seemed to happen? Even though you wished real hard, With all your heart,soul and passion.. Sometimes stars need a little help from someone close to you So if we wish together Then your wish is bound to come true I wish for you today,my friend peace wrapped up in angel wings to carry you through out your day and inspiration for all your dreams Serenity to surround you, hope to fill your world, Comfort in the just knowing Allah wants your wish fulfilled rainbows that fill your heart A beauty for your eyes to see Confidence for when you doubt and faith to help you believe And all the good things in this life that is arround us everyday See the silver linings in the clouds? That will wash your cares away take the time to hear the music and see the stars dancing in the sky And as you wish upon it always know I will be standing close by...

I need a help!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Right now is a midnight...but i dont wanna sleep at all because of my moskito bites..:((( I have

mor than 60 all over my body,can u imagine it???? some of you have already saw me today with this little cream with a stinky smell. I bought it yeasterday in a shoppers drug mart..:) they told me it is going to help me...but it didnt'..:( therefore, i wear jeans or pants these days..it sucks because no matter how hot it is outside, i cant wear skirts or dresses...:( It is so eachy..:((((( dunno what to do, cuz it is so unpleasant!!! guys...please give me some suggestions...what should i do in order to get rid of them????????;(( is there anybody who had already experienced having 60 moskito bites????( i have counted them just twenty minutes ago) and one more question,do i need to visit a doctor cuz somebody told me that here mositos can be vey dangerous....and i can catch some infections from them?is iot true?cuz im worrying about it....:(

hope dat' u can help me....

A bit of information about my country...lol

Kyrgyzstan is a very interesting country with a plentiful culture!!!!There are so many different nationalities in KG that made Kyrgyz culture so admirable and unique...;) Even though it contains some elements of mongolian and asian national characters, traditional kyrgyz culture is dominant.It is very modest and coservative,but in compar to other Central Asian countries just gently follows Islamic religion!!! There are many colourful customs ans special clebration in Kyrgyzstan tthat amare people from over the world. Each custom deflects Kyrgyz culture in one's own way; therfore, people carefully collect them, and pass from on generation to another. There is a variety of interesting traditional customs in Kyrgyzstan, and some visitors may find them very strange and inexpliable. For example, one of the oldest Kyrgyz custom is Bride Kidnaping...all of you have already listened to my presentation about this topic,ey? anyways, I gotta go sleep...well..no,I m gonna chat a bit ....:) so see you tomorrow..:)